Old Ladies & Animal Prints

It's a travesty you can't get the over the hill gal to stop the madness when it comes to animal prints. Do they think it staves off death? Keeps their heart pumping? Make them feel frisky? I know those are three of my answers!
Wheeeeeee!

I cannot not be defeated, not only do I sport the animal print but a modified motorcycle jacket also. The horror!

Can't stop there, never! Let's throw in some fuchsia hose!

Timeless and also ancient amongst my vast inventory, these black suede high heals have a cinched  buckle.

How to stop the animal prints? Firing squad..........

Pass the Crumpets, Yo..........

Tea with the ladies is an excruciating, torturous fete involving tea, sweets, upright cadavers and lots of narcoleptic gossip. Keeping my mouth perpetually crammed with crumpets I had little to add to the conversation. Thank God I'd hidden a flask in my skirt.

De rigueur for this monotonous occasion is poofy, lacy, girlie attire. I'm out of my comfort zone obviously.

Extracted from the collection of centuries old family heirlooms is this pearl encrusted gem.

Brown blouson sleeved ornately embroidered blouse from Antropologie. Fancy pink camisole beneath.

Observe some delicious detail in this garb.

Voile pleated skirt by a favorite brand, Nic and Zooey. Jiggy exposure.......

Irresistible shoe boots by Kensie with pink lace and button sides.

Much rather be a this tea party! Dig it!

Tina Turner Monday........

Unfeasible to ponder someone hotter than Tina Turner. Forgive me for even venturing to imply that I fall in that peripheral ilk. This garment just strikes me as something that might suit her fancy. Very work professional, no?

Another plastic sheath run amuck with grommets and skin baring rings. Oh heavens. Was demure enough to don this gold leather jacket to camouflage most of the damage.

But then the temperature creeped up and I had to dismiss the jacket. Ghastly. I can't help it if the climes go from 30 to 70 over the course of the day. Sue me!

Classic black hose and these rockin'  bronze shoe boots. So together today. A shame I'm about 80 years too old for this dress. I cherish it.

The Hair looks uncommonly familiar.

Yow.........it's Mao

Though screwed up to the extreme, I really dug Mao's look. I concur that I should be shot. Wasn't he doing that to people every 5 minutes?

I know it's anathema that I bought this sweater but couldn't resist the graphics.

You shudder at how hard-hearted I am..........

Goodwill tweed skirt bequeathed to me by Janet Hoelzel, the Goodwill Queen.

Thought these were whole hose of course, but when you're running a 6 minute mile getting dressed in your house, you've got to compromise.

         I thought I hated these shoes but hey, I like them! Forgot the clever kitten heels. Dig it!

                                                      Nice chicken bones in my feet. Eek!


                                                            Yummy, chicken. Wheeeeeee!

Rubberville...........

So I was going to wear my sparkly monkey mini skirt but the monkey hair was so caught in the zipper I had to amend my agenda. It's always something!

                                                      Hence my rubber skirt. Dig it!
                                                   

There I was, barreling down the freeway drinking a bottle of water in one hand, I split it all over myself. No problem! It's rubber!




Glossamer riveted blouse from Free People. I spared you by wearing an undergarment.

                                     Lie detector designed hose.  So cool, truthfully.............

A pair of Irregular Choice shoes.  Shall I cross the pond to procure them once again? Good idea!

                      Think I'll don some Tupperware garbs next week. Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Front or back, same thing........

Two things I was never captivated with were children or a bust. I'm thrilled to death to have a chest like an 8 year old boy and 6 dogs can attest to the former.  Psychedelic garb out of thin jersey and guess what? Some really jiggy ruching action happening around the bottom.  What up?

                        Here's the beauty of being sans bosom, I can wear this thing backwards! Dig it!

Plaid hose and one of my favorite brand of shoes, Faryl Robin. Yet another brand too cool for school i.e. too out there. They went the way of Irregular Choice, I had loads of those, intensely insane designs.Wanted to hang on to them as collectors items but sold them to Buffalo Exchange. Someone probably bought them, put them on EBay and made a million dollars. Can't be bothered, time is money. Hence I don't have any. Wheeeeee!

What the????????

Susan Skinner had this show a few years ago at the gallery where all the jewelry and 3 dimensional pieces she created were fabricated of paper. I purchased this vividly magnificent pin.

Okay, so I possess this grass green sweater from Antropologie that I was craving to wear. It was hip length and had a fairly modest v-neck. I pull it out of the vast inventory, dry cleaning tag still attached and now the thing has stretched out of all proportion. The v is now down to my sternum, you're going "what isn't?"

I'd have to have simian arms to correctly wear this. Fortunately is does conceal my dessicated bologna hands. Dig it!

                                        So now, I'm wearing it as a tunic, risky business!


                                                              Conjure a profession?

                                       Andy Warhol tights gifted to me by a friend.





Check these out. Green and black petroleum based platforms with guns on the heels. Wheeee!

If I could be described as anything I think the first thing that comes to everyone's mind is "OUT OF CONTROL".   Wheeeeeeeeeeee!

Pink and Grey Equals Black............

This stark, spiky, jagged choker by Beth Carter is in perfect conjunction with  the hard lined graphics of this frock. I love this grey and black wide striped piece!

Oh, here we go, can't stop  the madness!  My doppelganger insisted this was the way to go regarding leg treatment. I believe she's right, by golly.

Lace up shoes from Ground and Vision (R.I.P.) , quilted fabric toes, wooden heels, long leather ties.

She knows when to take sound advice from a fashion icon........